![No matter how long I ruminate, no matter how many lists I make, no matter how many pages of my roommate’s journal I transcribe, I can’t find a single good excuse for skipping the “Summer Slaughter Tour.” Just look at all that blood. If you’re the kind of person who sits for entire Sunn O))) albums in front of the mirror, practicing your fiercest scowl, I hope you donned your blackest of black robes and your whitest of white corpse paint and attended this group bloodcurdling. I didn’t.
When suddenly afflicted with an overwhelming urge to better my crumbling physique, I went to the gym without remembering that exercise is usually a mistake. There was a woman there on some sort of machine that looked like a cousin of the 18th century Nuremberg iron maiden, and as she grunted I caught her eye. She totally wants me, I thought, so I casually waved at her with the 10-pound dumbbell in my hand, simultaneously pulling a muscle in my armpit I had forgotten was there. Played it off as a nothing and got my clipped wing out of that place. Spent the next two weeks applying deodorant gingerly. Told everyone it was a tickling injury.
[via accident prone]](http://27.media.tumblr.com/azxD5kcjldae7fyzipKe1XYP_400.jpg)
No matter how long I ruminate, no matter how many lists I make, no matter how many pages of my roommate’s journal I transcribe, I can’t find a single good excuse for skipping the “Summer Slaughter Tour.” Just look at all that blood. If you’re the kind of person who sits for entire Sunn O))) albums in front of the mirror, practicing your fiercest scowl, I hope you donned your blackest of black robes and your whitest of white corpse paint and attended this group bloodcurdling. I didn’t.
When suddenly afflicted with an overwhelming urge to better my crumbling physique, I went to the gym without remembering that exercise is usually a mistake. There was a woman there on some sort of machine that looked like a cousin of the 18th century Nuremberg iron maiden, and as she grunted I caught her eye. She totally wants me, I thought, so I casually waved at her with the 10-pound dumbbell in my hand, simultaneously pulling a muscle in my armpit I had forgotten was there. Played it off as a nothing and got my clipped wing out of that place. Spent the next two weeks applying deodorant gingerly. Told everyone it was a tickling injury.
[via accident prone]
